An apology came in from one of the teachers. And an apology from me comes with it. It appears that the reason I was not tested was not because someone forgot, but because there was a confusion about my current rank and affiliation.
Because I studied in Japan for almost 5 years, my American teacher thought that I'd tested in Japan because he couldn't find record of my earning my shodan in the US. That was his mistake, because I tested in front of his very eyes several years ago. I don't blame him for that, however. How many hundreds of black belts must he have given out by this time, that he would remember one test more than 6 years ago..?
He promptly found the record after I was able to prove that I did indeed test in the US, rather than under a different affiliation in Japan. He then also granted my in-house teacher the ability to test me whenever he liked. This is slightly unusual; it is more common to have a panel of judges or to do the testing during a seminar when many higher ranking folk are present.
All said and done, I am very happy just for the chance to test. I just hope it happens... the other yudansha in the dojo have been helping me to prepare just about every night since Sensei made the announcement that I will have a physical test after all. I have started to feel excited again, and don't want to take another hit like this. If I do have to, though, I think I already said that it doesn't affect my Aikido or my job here, to work to create a heaven on earth.
I don't know what testing is like for other people; maybe most people follow a straighter path than I, or maybe everyone goes through challenges like these on the path towards self-purification. I don't know what to do with my teacher's apology but to accept it and prepare for a hell of a nidan test!!
Thursday, June 3, 2010
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